Something I learnt from the bible is that being a pussy holds you back from your calling. Moses vs Pharaoh, David vs Goliath, Christ vs the cross. Its true for us at every level too, even national. Theres a twisted relationship between safety and freedom. If we act cowardly and appease ourselves or others, our lives have no meaningful freedom and certainly no legacy. It’s why everyone remembers Churchill and only a few remember Chamberlain.
Oath bro - what a great comment, and you are exactly right: We have no meaningful freedom if we have no courage. It is almost as if freedom is nonsensical without courage.
There is no other way to build a great man. Two quotes:
The attempt to escape pain is what creates more pain.
Gabor Mate
The foundation of all mental illness is the unwillingness to experience legitimate suffering.
Carl Jung
It is why I have always deeply enjoyed Solzhenitsyn's works, and all similar stories of immense hardship, such as Murder of a Gentle Land, for example. It is a natural law: The tightest-ringed, strongest wood grows in fierce competition with others.
It is why I have always heated my home with scrounged wood, why I would rather do something badly myself than hire out, why I limit myself to one meal a day, why I never bemoan my lack of friends or girlfriends. It's why we are ruled by spineless cowards. It explains much.
Ahh, you've just described my friend group when I was just out of school well ... all our sports went out the window when we found the white powder. For years, too. I'm grateful now we have some sense, and focus our energies into other means.
Enjoyed reading this. It is very true that comfort and safety have become like gods or idols to us in this modern world. We - though sad as it might be in the moment - learn from pain, but until the fear of the pain is replaced by fear of the absence of progress, we will not, as you said be "continually reborn." Appreciated the honesty and thoughtfulness of this article. This is a definite need among the young men that do not go ski, play rugby (or in the U.S. football), or find other ways to push themselves that are not just physical. Though, I think if you have physical danger and no societal danger (being embarrassed to embrace something you firmly believe in) you are still lacking an important avenue of growth; we need both of these dangers to grow I think.
This is a great call and charge to face danger and withstand it.
Yeah I think your right - as you termed it 'societal danger' is necessary alongside physical danger for sure. Our characters need to developed in several ways, not just the physical.
This essay reminds me of a trio of gaming friends I made back when I used to play World of Warcraft with regularity, at the height of the Wrath of the Lich King expansion. I can't recall the names of all their characters, but I'll refer to the two I xan by their in-game names and the third by his first initial: Tano, Tahurm, and H. They were a trio of childhood friends from Australia, and they hit it off very well with myself, my great friend Heavy, and a couple mutual friends who lived local to us, Velroz and Terra.
Some years down the line, after Wrath had ended and the next expansion, Cataclysm, was well underway, Tano and H flew out here to the US to travel the country and visit a bunch of us. Sadly they never made it down this way, but they visited Heavy after he moved back up to central CA with his brother and dad, and planned to see a few other members of our guild across the country. They'd slated for a full month trip, exploring various US states entirely on their own. After roughly 11 days, though, Tano had second thoughts and ended up wussing out. I heard from Tahurm later - whom I did end up meeting about ten years ago when he made the trip out here to the States - that Tano and H got into a huge fight about Tano wanting to quit because it would leave H to fend entirely on his own. I understand homesickness, it hits all of us at some point, but these two were supposed to be best friends, and here one of them was tucking his tail between his legs and running home.
H stuck out the trip for the full month. Visited our then guild lead Beefy and his wife Green, went to Hawaii to visit our guild's resident troll Sato, and even stopped by Kansas to visit the best friend of our original guild lead Fas, who sadly passed away from a car accident two years before they made this trip. Tano, sadly, did run home, and he got an absolute verbal thrashing from his older brother who had words for him that were similar to the words your dad for you. Words which is was familiar with because we once heard Tano's brother tell him this when he was bitching about something over our voice chat in raid one day: "Quit your fucking complaining, swallow a spoonful of concrete, and harden the fuck up you sook."
Sadly, when I met Tahurm face to face I learned that incident was a falling out between Tano and H. Tano basically cut both of them off, and H developed a bad drug habit that he struggled to kick. Seeking that right sort of danger is an important thing for young men, of that there is no doubt in my mind. That said, I think it's equally important to consider who you seek it with. I don't know for sure how heavily this falling out played into H's addiction, but from what Tahurm told me it definitely played a part. That rift pushed him towards a "friend" group that enabled such behavior. I've not heard what's happened since then, but my hope is Tahurm was able to help guide him back to healthier living. He was trying at that time, but I never learned if H actually listened or not.
What a fascinating story. Must have been a bit nerve-racking meeting online people in real life?
You are right about being selective of who we hang around. In H's case, I can definitely imagine loosing one set of friends, and then becoming a meaningful member of another group - only for that latter group to have a different ... hobby haha. I was fortunate in my own case that my friends were friends for life - and each, in their own little ways, had a similar realisation to mine. So nobody had to 'leave the group'. It was more that we left the drugs, as it were.
Distilling the medicine needed for modern masculinity down to a sentence may seem overly reductive, but at its essence you have identified the problem. A very nice piece.
Not to say one should always chose the risky option. There is a place for being careful, for choosing the safe option. Sometimes it's better to stand on a 16, to borrow an analogy from blackjack. The problem is that the balance between safety and risk in men has been disturbed, or perhaps more aptly destroyed. Many men today have bought in to the narrative that their masculinity itself is problematic. They are like neutered dogs. Infantalized by pathological and domineering feminists, and the metaphorical army of eunuchs they have built around them. I should know, I became that 'sorry' guy for a time. I wanted to fit in. I was sick of polarizing people, of being disliked for who I am. But what did it gain me? The approval and recognition I craved did not obtain, I was not, I could not, be a part of the group, I had merely become neutered, still suspect, but no longer worth the ire. Winston Smith sitting at the bar at the end.
In the end it is in the wilderness (metaphorical or literal) that one rediscovers their innate masculinity. To not need to mold oneself overmuch to fit in. But to be exactly who they are, to bend sometimes where necessary, but never to break. To take calculated risks to get ahead, to gain, to build, to foster connections with like minded people rather than trying to be liked by everyone. To become the rock that a good woman would recognize. To accept that your masculinity is going to upset a lot of Karens and their eunuchs. And that their hatred is not personal. They don't really know you. They're sick of mind, and in their sickness, they see you as an instantiation of the devil, as their twisted politico-religion tells them. To have the wisdom to know what conflicts are worth your sword, and what battles would be pyrrhic, and unworthy of your budding nobility.
To build, to create, to shape, to be loyal to those who deserve your friendship, to aid them when they need you. To strive for greatness, and pass yourself on. To keep your imminent death in mind as a context, to move forward with courage in the face of it. To me that is what defines a man.
What a great comment thanks for sharing. I especially like this last bit:
"To build, to create, to shape, to be loyal to those who deserve your friendship, to aid them when they need you. To strive for greatness, and pass yourself on. To keep your imminent death in mind as a context, to move forward with courage in the face of it. To me that is what defines a man."
Loyalty to his friends (and his woman) makes or breaks a man, that is for sure. Whether he becomes a woman, an eununch, a boy, I am not too sure - but a man who is not loyal to his friends, well, fuck, he deserves a neck-wringing lol. The second part is extremely important. For whatever battle it is you undertake, you need to accept death, before moving forward - because as you implied - a man who moves forward despite knowing he may die, well, damn, he is formidable indeed.
Important message and read, as always.
To add to your great words;
Something I learnt from the bible is that being a pussy holds you back from your calling. Moses vs Pharaoh, David vs Goliath, Christ vs the cross. Its true for us at every level too, even national. Theres a twisted relationship between safety and freedom. If we act cowardly and appease ourselves or others, our lives have no meaningful freedom and certainly no legacy. It’s why everyone remembers Churchill and only a few remember Chamberlain.
Oath bro - what a great comment, and you are exactly right: We have no meaningful freedom if we have no courage. It is almost as if freedom is nonsensical without courage.
There is no other way to build a great man. Two quotes:
The attempt to escape pain is what creates more pain.
Gabor Mate
The foundation of all mental illness is the unwillingness to experience legitimate suffering.
Carl Jung
It is why I have always deeply enjoyed Solzhenitsyn's works, and all similar stories of immense hardship, such as Murder of a Gentle Land, for example. It is a natural law: The tightest-ringed, strongest wood grows in fierce competition with others.
It is why I have always heated my home with scrounged wood, why I would rather do something badly myself than hire out, why I limit myself to one meal a day, why I never bemoan my lack of friends or girlfriends. It's why we are ruled by spineless cowards. It explains much.
Well said. I like the part about doing things yourself. I try to do the same.
Ahh, you've just described my friend group when I was just out of school well ... all our sports went out the window when we found the white powder. For years, too. I'm grateful now we have some sense, and focus our energies into other means.
Enjoyed reading this. It is very true that comfort and safety have become like gods or idols to us in this modern world. We - though sad as it might be in the moment - learn from pain, but until the fear of the pain is replaced by fear of the absence of progress, we will not, as you said be "continually reborn." Appreciated the honesty and thoughtfulness of this article. This is a definite need among the young men that do not go ski, play rugby (or in the U.S. football), or find other ways to push themselves that are not just physical. Though, I think if you have physical danger and no societal danger (being embarrassed to embrace something you firmly believe in) you are still lacking an important avenue of growth; we need both of these dangers to grow I think.
This is a great call and charge to face danger and withstand it.
Yeah I think your right - as you termed it 'societal danger' is necessary alongside physical danger for sure. Our characters need to developed in several ways, not just the physical.
Thank you for the read and the kind words.
This essay reminds me of a trio of gaming friends I made back when I used to play World of Warcraft with regularity, at the height of the Wrath of the Lich King expansion. I can't recall the names of all their characters, but I'll refer to the two I xan by their in-game names and the third by his first initial: Tano, Tahurm, and H. They were a trio of childhood friends from Australia, and they hit it off very well with myself, my great friend Heavy, and a couple mutual friends who lived local to us, Velroz and Terra.
Some years down the line, after Wrath had ended and the next expansion, Cataclysm, was well underway, Tano and H flew out here to the US to travel the country and visit a bunch of us. Sadly they never made it down this way, but they visited Heavy after he moved back up to central CA with his brother and dad, and planned to see a few other members of our guild across the country. They'd slated for a full month trip, exploring various US states entirely on their own. After roughly 11 days, though, Tano had second thoughts and ended up wussing out. I heard from Tahurm later - whom I did end up meeting about ten years ago when he made the trip out here to the States - that Tano and H got into a huge fight about Tano wanting to quit because it would leave H to fend entirely on his own. I understand homesickness, it hits all of us at some point, but these two were supposed to be best friends, and here one of them was tucking his tail between his legs and running home.
H stuck out the trip for the full month. Visited our then guild lead Beefy and his wife Green, went to Hawaii to visit our guild's resident troll Sato, and even stopped by Kansas to visit the best friend of our original guild lead Fas, who sadly passed away from a car accident two years before they made this trip. Tano, sadly, did run home, and he got an absolute verbal thrashing from his older brother who had words for him that were similar to the words your dad for you. Words which is was familiar with because we once heard Tano's brother tell him this when he was bitching about something over our voice chat in raid one day: "Quit your fucking complaining, swallow a spoonful of concrete, and harden the fuck up you sook."
Sadly, when I met Tahurm face to face I learned that incident was a falling out between Tano and H. Tano basically cut both of them off, and H developed a bad drug habit that he struggled to kick. Seeking that right sort of danger is an important thing for young men, of that there is no doubt in my mind. That said, I think it's equally important to consider who you seek it with. I don't know for sure how heavily this falling out played into H's addiction, but from what Tahurm told me it definitely played a part. That rift pushed him towards a "friend" group that enabled such behavior. I've not heard what's happened since then, but my hope is Tahurm was able to help guide him back to healthier living. He was trying at that time, but I never learned if H actually listened or not.
What a fascinating story. Must have been a bit nerve-racking meeting online people in real life?
You are right about being selective of who we hang around. In H's case, I can definitely imagine loosing one set of friends, and then becoming a meaningful member of another group - only for that latter group to have a different ... hobby haha. I was fortunate in my own case that my friends were friends for life - and each, in their own little ways, had a similar realisation to mine. So nobody had to 'leave the group'. It was more that we left the drugs, as it were.
Distilling the medicine needed for modern masculinity down to a sentence may seem overly reductive, but at its essence you have identified the problem. A very nice piece.
Not to say one should always chose the risky option. There is a place for being careful, for choosing the safe option. Sometimes it's better to stand on a 16, to borrow an analogy from blackjack. The problem is that the balance between safety and risk in men has been disturbed, or perhaps more aptly destroyed. Many men today have bought in to the narrative that their masculinity itself is problematic. They are like neutered dogs. Infantalized by pathological and domineering feminists, and the metaphorical army of eunuchs they have built around them. I should know, I became that 'sorry' guy for a time. I wanted to fit in. I was sick of polarizing people, of being disliked for who I am. But what did it gain me? The approval and recognition I craved did not obtain, I was not, I could not, be a part of the group, I had merely become neutered, still suspect, but no longer worth the ire. Winston Smith sitting at the bar at the end.
In the end it is in the wilderness (metaphorical or literal) that one rediscovers their innate masculinity. To not need to mold oneself overmuch to fit in. But to be exactly who they are, to bend sometimes where necessary, but never to break. To take calculated risks to get ahead, to gain, to build, to foster connections with like minded people rather than trying to be liked by everyone. To become the rock that a good woman would recognize. To accept that your masculinity is going to upset a lot of Karens and their eunuchs. And that their hatred is not personal. They don't really know you. They're sick of mind, and in their sickness, they see you as an instantiation of the devil, as their twisted politico-religion tells them. To have the wisdom to know what conflicts are worth your sword, and what battles would be pyrrhic, and unworthy of your budding nobility.
To build, to create, to shape, to be loyal to those who deserve your friendship, to aid them when they need you. To strive for greatness, and pass yourself on. To keep your imminent death in mind as a context, to move forward with courage in the face of it. To me that is what defines a man.
What a great comment thanks for sharing. I especially like this last bit:
"To build, to create, to shape, to be loyal to those who deserve your friendship, to aid them when they need you. To strive for greatness, and pass yourself on. To keep your imminent death in mind as a context, to move forward with courage in the face of it. To me that is what defines a man."
Loyalty to his friends (and his woman) makes or breaks a man, that is for sure. Whether he becomes a woman, an eununch, a boy, I am not too sure - but a man who is not loyal to his friends, well, fuck, he deserves a neck-wringing lol. The second part is extremely important. For whatever battle it is you undertake, you need to accept death, before moving forward - because as you implied - a man who moves forward despite knowing he may die, well, damn, he is formidable indeed.